Some rules that my friend Ben and I created:
1) If you are in a sour mood, most types of whiskey will not improve that mood. They taste good… they convince you that they’re a good idea… they’ll put their hands on your shoulder and commiserate… but most of the time, their friends are waiting around the corner with a baseball bat and a sack of oranges (no bruises).
2) If you have done something in your life, you will have always done that thing. You may not be doing it now, but that doesn’t keep it from being a part of your history. For example, I worked at Capella University for four years. It’s not something I particularly enjoyed for any length of time. I met some great people (the K’s), but I’m not proud of the work I accomplished there and I wish never to return. Even though I’m not still currently working there, I will always “have worked” there… that experience cannot be scrubbed away. I know the concept of “the past” seems like common knowledge to most people, but after a couple drinks and an episode of the BBC Office on Sunday night, it seemed like a revelation.
3) When you are planning for the future, be sure to take stock of the things you enjoy doing now, every day. Make time for the things you enjoy. Don’t “have time,” “make time.” Time does not grow on trees. Time does not just show up on your door step and offer pieces of itself to you. For example, if a kid plays video games all day, he really doesn’t “have” time for anything… his day is full. If he wants to eat a hamburger, he has to “make” time for that hamburger. He has to specifically block out a 15 second period where he can pry his sticky fingers away from the keyboard, run to the kitchen, inhale some food, and return to the keyboard. Unfortunately, even in that situation, the time has to made, manipulated, and scheduled.
4) Watching videos of cyst-popping is awesome (Ben’s opinion diverges with mine on this topic).